Apr 30

I Ponder as I Ponder

I am constantly in thought. I think about my life, the life of my loved ones, society, and the future. I am constantly befuddled by the bad, evil, and wrong in the world. Perplexed.

I’m fairly intelligent, but I cannot ever seem to wrap my head around what people will do in the name of Love, God, and Country. I’m even more perplexed by what people will do just to do.

Perhaps I should have been a Sociologist; I love people and am fascinated by them. I am fascinated by how people think, why they think, how they act, why they act, and all the other whys and hows you can think of.
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Apr 20

If I Died Today, I Wanted You To Know…

Life is all about experiences which create memories which compose our great life movie. Why make a dull documentary when you can make a comedy? A classic dramedy? We want to feel something, so why not make yourself feel? Do something that will make you happy. Laugh, cry, feel…whatever it takes. You get one shot [that you really know of…I personally can’t remember being anyone else and would hate if I do come back to forget and have to relearn such a lesson all over again…] so why not make it the best one? Life is too short. So short. In the scheme of things, we are so miniscule that it’s almost depressing lol. If I died today, I would want you to know that life is too short not to EXPERIENCE it.

Apr 14

In the Mirror

In the Mirror

Like aromatherapy; starts in one location and disperses all over. Warm. Tickles almost. You can feel the butterflies. You lose your breath. Your pulse races. And that’s just at the thought of her arms around you. That’s a good feeling! Make no mistake: you can’t write about something you have not experienced. Especially something so deep inside that it rocks you to your core. If you don’t know that feeling, you don’t know the smile you can’t wipe from your face just thinking about it. A simple embrace-a hug- is a wave of emotions in your body. Just placing your hand in the small of her back is too much to handle. And nevermind if she even thinks about nuzzling her face into your neck. The hairs on the back of your neck stand up in a good way. It’s just all good.
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Apr 11

Word Vomit

Butterflies, anxiety,
Nervous shakes, panic
What can you do
If you can’t understand it
Welcome to my nightmare
Where I lay my heart bare
Everybody stare
At me
Weak in
My knees
F*ck all relationships
I’m just tryin to deal with this
Road block
Me in
My sins
Dominating lately
Blinded lust
I see
Help me
Let me
Be free
Where’s the fire and brimstone
Tragedy that I’ve known
Takin in your scent;
Sunday go repent
Evil that’s inside of me
It’s just this cruel reality
Nothing actuality
This lame attempt at poetry
Why you lookin down at me
With everything reality
T. V.
Everything a stink bomb
People look at me wrong
Same song, same beat
Can I make you
My feat
My treat, your pleasure
Will you be
My treasure
Fool’s Gold
Your hold
Damn you’re makin
Me bold
State the facts,
Must be smacked,
Lost that thought
I can’t keep track
Nervous act
Can’t be right
What you sight,
What you see–
This crazy b*tch
Isn’t me
I’m waitin for an invitation
Emotion driven inclination
A night you won’t forget
And surely not regret
God is gonna smite me
Despite me
I think I just
Might be
Clown posse
Someone get these
Clowns off me
Making fun of Bozo
That lonely feeling I know
Someone change the damn show
You come
Make you want
To get
Intoxicated encore
You have me in an uproar
What am I to do
When all I want is you
Why’d I even go there
This ain’t goin nowhere
Blinded by your smile
Baby stay awhile
Man you set this fire in me
Even in uncertainty
Let me be your casualty
Never f*ckin hateful
Always soft and sweet
Baby I’m a treat
Tell me where to meet
What the hell should I do
Always right behind you

Apr 08

Child Abused

You look at me
over there;
you judge my life
without a care.

You see the bad
inside of me,
instead of good
that I could be.

You stunt my growth
with every hit,
for love with hate
just don’t fit.

You beat me down
with just one word,
when names from parents
should not be heard.

Support you get
from mom and dad;
you turn to them
when life is bad.

But who is there
when they turn their cheek?
or lends an ear
when you feel weak?

You look at me
with judging eyes,
but your rare evil
you can’t disguise.

Apr 07

Same Game

Never enough money,
Never enough love,
Never enough mercy
From the good man above.
Always strain
Causing pain
The same lame game:

Searching for the answers,
No one can help, why?
All they do is sit and stare,
Listenin to you cry.
Forever lost
At great cost
Always pissed off: